13 08 2016 Visit to Mr L

It has been 5 weeks since I've last went for the weekly visits due to my summer exchange at the UK. Nevertheless, I was still back last Saturday for the weekly visit.

Together with my friend from Paint-a-Home, Jia Yue and a CSC veteran, Huai Kit, I was assigned to visit Mr L.

For that visit, we brought him for a hair cut and had some coffee with him at the nearby coffee shop. Similar to many other visits, he still seem to hop around different topics in his conversation with us. Most of his points were incoherent and it can be quite difficult to piece the different information together that will aid us to better understand his stories.

After we finish our beverages at the coffee shop, we decided to bring him for a stroll at the nearby park and he seemed to enjoy our time out. However, when the clock struck 1230hrs, we still have to bring him back and I can tell that he was rather reluctant to get back home.

He wanted us to leave him at the void deck and he insisted that he will be able to return home by himself. I initially subscribed to his idea, believing that he will be able to do so. However, I was reminded that we, as the volunteers, are responsible for the well-being of the elderlies. Therefore, we decided to bring him home in the end.

-Joel Chew

爱在心底

We were chatting about everything under the Sun. Random things actually, then we touched on the topic of kids. As I have seldom heard her praise her next generation (she always carries strong stern words in her mouth), I asked her: 你的儿子很乖meh? I half expected her to continue with her harsh words, in a jokingly manner as usual. But that day she had words of praise for him.

She brought us back in time, telling us all about how her son was very mature at a young age and started following her to work (she was a samsui woman). She told us that even though he did not receive a very extended education, he is a skilled person and has his own little business today.

She continued sharing about her family. Her granddaughters, nieces etc, some of whom are living in the other end of the world now. She mentioned about her great granddaughter who has left the country with her parents to study/work in Australia. She recalled when they last met a while back, when the young lady was at "ah tai"'s house before she left Singapore.

Ah tai said to her little one: if she moved to Australia, ah tai would not be able to see her when she wanted to. The girl at a young age of 12 thought for a bit, then took out her camera and snapped a few polaroids in the house, with her beloved great granny.

Mdm W who was seated at her usual position slowly extended her right arm out to her wallet that was placed on the shelf a hand's length away. She opened the zip on the seasoned pouch and pulled out a polaroid of them two, kept safely in a wrinkled zip lock pouch. She handed us the photo, her overall expression and eyes beaming with pride and love.

As she talked about her love, it just brought a very sweet feeling to me. It really was pretty amazing, i could literally taste the sweetness in my tongue haha.

Not only once had the straighforward, no nonsense Mdm W reminded me that love exists in many places. Perhaps the most beautiful of all is the hidden love that we all have, tugged away and sometimes hidden in the deepest corner of our hearts. I guess sometimes we need to look a bit further :)

爱在心底, 甜在心里.


Kai Him.

a certain saturday

I bring my thoughts back to a certain saturday last month. 5th March.

I was allocated to visit a new elderly which was in itself something new - usually i visit my "favourites" who are the canto ladies. Mdm A, i have never met before nor seen her photo. I recall stories of her from the sharings by the rest. 

We entered the house, and it was not what i imagined. she is an energetic lady. and most outstanding of all, she had a great great sense of humour. like a welcoming senior, she made sure we felt at home and talked to us like friends, sharing her stories and thoughts. i loved it. 

I particularly like meeting someone for the first time and looking into their eyes, wondering what is going on behind them. what does the person really feel and think. sometimes, you meet someone and you talk about something personal, and sometimes you hear about something personal. it is an amazing feeling to talk to someone you barely know the way you talk to someone you knew your entire life. that is what i get sometimes in this community. the elderly who are really sincere and open, nothing to hide behind, just showing their true selves. 

Somehow i felt a little connection. as we talked, we nodded, we watched tv, we added new topics, we joked. i love it when we can joke around. i think making light conversations and adding humour into mundane small talk is one of my better skills, and now i know it is certainly one of Mdm A's as well. 

There were two particular moments that brought me a wide smile, 0.5ml of tears to my eyes and a much lighter heart for the weekend. 

Firstly, she told us how thankful she was of some volunteer that came to visit her, helped her and came to be her friend. She said she wanted the organisation the volunteer was from to give her an "outstanding" or "excellent" award or something like that (the exact words were much better at summarizing her love for this volunteer but i forgot). As she spoke, tears welled up in her eyes and it was apparent that she was emotionally shaken up by just a simple recollection of how she was helped by someone. I am thankful and i wished i had a way to record this scene in front of me and play if for the particular person to see how impactful her kind work is. heart warming.

Secondly, she shared with us that she loved to work. she used to pack laptops in a company and before that other jobs as well. she told us she made many friends there and enjoyed herself much. now that the company feels she cant contribute and she has to retire, she misses out on the times when she has the company of her colleagues of different races etc. indeed, work may seem stressful or sometimes boring, but having friends and sharing great times with my colleagues is one of the best things that keep my spirits up and not dread going to work 2 hours away from my bed. the smile on her face just talking about the times she had enjoyed at work was very encouraging and it is a great lesson to all young adults in singapore.

Really thankful to have spent that half an hour to one hour time having a chat with her and feeling much more appreciative of what i have today. hope you have the chance to meet her as well. and i hope she tells you a ghost story :D

- Kai Him.

19 March - Visit to Mdm C

Hi everyone, this is my first time posting on this blog and I hope I will have more to share with the upcoming visits.

This week, Yuan Qin and I visited Mdm C. This is my first time visiting her and I was very excited to meet her. When we arrived, she was busy preparing her lunch and she told us to wait for a while before opening the door. After entering, we passed Mdm C a token of appreciation for contributing her story and asked her to acknowledge that she received it by signing on a form. While signing the form, she excitedly told us about her learning how to write her name in Chinese and she also told us about how she is attempting to pick up english from the volunteers. It is indeed heartening to know that despite her age, she is still trying to pick up a new language.

Following that, we helped her clean her windows and mop the floor. While doing the chores, she guided us on the right way to do the chores and also shared stories with us. She took out old photographs and told us stories about her husband and daughter. We could see the joy in her while she was reminiscing about the past. Before we left, she also gave us two packets of drinks and thanked us for our help. 

This visit definitely taught me a lot but one thing that definitely strikes me is her willingness to learn no matter how difficult it is. Thank You Mdm C. I really look forward to subsequent visits. 

- Shan Ying

16th Jan 2016- Visit to Mr L

Hello haha :) This is my first time writing on this blog and I hope that I'll have more stuff to share with subsequent visits.

During last Saturday's visit, I visited Mr L together with Defa and Kevin. As I'm new to T.H.E.S, this was my first time meeting him and I was quite excited. Despite meeting him for the first time, he was very welcoming and kept asking us to make ourselves at home. Mr L seemed a little tired initially, but he still took the effort to talk to us and shared a lot of interesting things.
Talking to Mr L made me feel a bit bad because often, he had to explain some Chinese words or terms that I didn't understand in the middle of his anecdotes but even then, he was still patient. He told us about his dog, Lucky and sang quite a few songs for us that I really enjoyed haha.

After the visit, what stayed with me was even though Mr L was alone at home much of the time because of Mrs L's work, he remained cheerful and didn't complain or grumble about his boredom. Also, even though Mr L really seems to love music and singing, he has no radio or music player that could help ease his boredom and he also said that it's no longer very convenient for him to watch TV because of his failing eyesight.

I'm thankful that I got to visit him that day and hear some of his stories. Just listening to him sing and laughing at his jokes really made my day and even though our visit was brief, but I hope we made his morning a little more interesting and happier. I feel like there is so much I can learn from the elderly and I'm excited to go back and meet Mrs L and the other elderly :) Thank you for reading!

- Bianche

Visit to Mdm A - 16 Jan

My first blog post!

This week, i went to visit Mdm A with Joel. Mdm A just came back from the hospital on Friday and is still feeling some pain in her legs. Despite being in the hospital for the past 1 week, she was still very cheerful and chatty. She shared many things about herself, from the experience in the hospital, her past and her family. I am really very amazed by how optimistic Mdm A is, especially after everything that she has gone through in her life. Chatting with Mdm A also made me realised that the things that we go through in life are all just small parts of our life and we really shouldn't dwell on it so much.

Then, Mdm A requested for us to help her with the cleaning of her fan and buying some stuff from NTUC. Joel started helping her to clean her fans while i went to NTUC. This is the 1st time that i am helping an elderly to buy grocery and the whole time i was thinking what if i buy the wrong stuff. And i really bought the wrong bananas for her. Even though i bought the wrong one, Mdm A kept thanking us. The little things that we do for the elderly felt effortless for us but the elderly really appreciate our help.

After every visit, there will always be something to learn from the different elderly. And these experience enriches my life. Looking forward to the next visit!

- Vigilia

Visit to Mdm L - 16th January 2016

Hi guys! This is my first blog post and I hope that I will have more to share in the future!

This time round, Kai Him, Jeraldine and I visited Mdm L. As usual, Mdm L bought a lot of food for us and kept reminding us to eat them hahaha. I was about to help Mdm L with the usual routine of housework after some chit-chatting when she asked me to explain an English letter to her. It was while attempting to do so that I realised that I need to brush up on my translation skills hahaha. Coming from a Chinese-speaking family, I thought I was okay at translating but I guess I was so used to code-mixing that I had difficulty recalling some terms in Chinese, such as “MSF” and “CPF statement”. Thankfully, Kai Him and Jeraldine were there to help convey a clearer message.

After that, we went on to do some housework while Mdm L washed up. Apart from the usual routine, there was something new to do this time round. We noticed ants trailing across the walls transporting their food and Mdm L mentioned the problem as well. A lady who visited her earlier on noticed the ants and Mdm L was concerned about the impression that others have of her house. I think for many seniors, their homes are really something that they want to be proud of because one’s home can reflect his or her personality. Thus, we traced the path of the ants and killed them with the spray.

On our way to the hawker centre, Mdm L asked a few times if I was following behind when I was not within her field of vision. Although it was just a small gesture, it was rather heart-warming for me. :) On a side note, Mdm L seemed a bit forgetful that day because she forgot to take her medicine and bring the house keys with her until we reminded her hahaha.

I feel that every single visit I went truly widened my horizon and helped me to have a bigger heart. There is so much to learn from both the elderly and volunteers and I did work that I was not used to doing back at home or have never thought that I would need to do. These are the reasons that keep me looking forward to every Saturday morning. At the end of every visit, I learn a little bit more about not just our seniors but also fellow T.H.E.S volunteers and myself. :)

That's all I have to share, have a great day! :)

- Yuan Qin